I’m gonna win this year.
I’ll be hard on myself to finish what I’ve started.
My ultimate goal for this year is to pull my self together again.
No more escaping, no more playing victim.
I’ll be taking control of my life,
To gain my freedom,
To be the person God wants me to be.
So, 2024, bring it on.
I am ready.
I am trully sorry for not being capable to be as strong, motivated, persistent, and sane as expected. I understand if you feel tired and sick of me. You know you can leave every time you want. Feel free to walk away. You wont ever be the one to blame. Maybe our timing was just not right. you are ready to fly, while I still have to struggle with my own self. That's okay. You've done everything you can, I really appreciate that. It's just that, it turns out I need more time for this process.
I am well aware that there will come a time when I will shed tears of regret. But that's okay. I will still be happy to see you flying high from down here. Hopefully you will find a soulmate whose wings are as strong as yours, so that your journey will be far from lonely. In the meantime, I will be patient with my own process. My goals wont change. It's just possibly slower than we would prefer. It's really okay. Let's see if our paths will cross again someday. if that happens, hopefully the situation will be much better.
So, don't worry about me. Just spread your wings and fly!
Oh, and I want you to know that I always wish happiness for you.
p.s. I love you, you know that.
Semoga lama hidupmu di sini
Melihatku berjuang hingga akhir
Seperti detak jantung yang bertaut
Nyawaku nyala karena denganmu.
