Am I?

Am I allowed to still count on you?

Well, this is it.

The light at the end of the tunnel.

It might not lead me to where I wanted it to be,

Yet, at least I have found the light brings my darkest time to an end.

It might not seem as beautiful as I wished,

But I believe I have landed at the right place.

I may not understand it now,

But I will someday,

When the Almighty God reveals His grand plans,

Allow me to see the bigger picture,

Then I will find my heart full of love and gratitude.

InsyaAllah.

14Y

 Sesak sekali

Yang telah diendapkan sekian lama

Mendobrak keluar.

Do you?

 

You look happier,

 

“Terobos saja” katanya.

“Seperti air yang mengalir di sungai?” Tanyaku

“Exactly” tegasnya.

Hallo, 2024

I’m gonna win this year.

I’ll be hard on myself to finish what I’ve started.

My ultimate goal for this year is to pull my self together again.

No more escaping, no more playing victim.

I’ll be taking control of my life,

To gain my freedom,

To be the person God wants me to be.

So, 2024, bring it on.

I am ready. 

Gegap gempita

Lalu 

Sunyi

Well, hi 2024

Terlalu riuh di luar.

Tapi tidak bisa membungkam bising di dalam kepala.

 Bismillah. Satu satu. 

 Stop escaping. 

Just face it.

The art of letting go

I am trully sorry for not being capable to be as strong, motivated, persistent, and sane as expected. I understand if you feel tired and sick of me. You know you can leave every time you want. Feel free to walk away. You wont ever be the one to blame. Maybe our timing was just not right. you are ready to fly, while I still have to struggle with my own self. That's okay. You've done everything you can, I really appreciate that. It's just that, it turns out I need more time for this process.

I am well aware that there will come a time when I will shed tears of regret. But that's okay. I will still be happy to see you flying high from down here. Hopefully you will find a soulmate whose wings are as strong as yours, so that your journey will be far from lonely. In the meantime, I will be patient with my own process. My goals wont change. It's just possibly slower than we would prefer. It's really okay. Let's see if our paths will cross again someday. if that happens, hopefully the situation will be much better.

So, don't worry about me. Just spread your wings and fly!

Oh, and I want you to know that I always wish happiness for you.

p.s. I love you, you know that. 

Ma, be strong, OK?

Di ruang paling dalam

Terlalu jauh 

Tak terselam

 

So be it.

Mood

Swing

Swang

Swung

Swinnging